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At almost 39 weeks I started having false labor – back pain, nausea, hip & pubic bone pain along with regular, timeable contractions that would eventually disappear on their own and when I changed activities. The first day it happened I was standing in Lowe’s buying painting supplies and my back started hurting and I had weird pains in my belly, almost like I was going to get sick. Then two days later my pain got substantially worse plus regular contractions coming every 20 minutes at first and every 7 minutes by that evening. I thought for sure I would have my baby that night or the next day but then I went to bed and slept great and woke up in the morning feeling great, even had a burst of energy so I cleaned the house! It returned several times over the next several days and I was exhausted. I took many hot baths to help the back pain, sat on my birth ball, laid on the couch, took walks, anything to help the discomfort and either make it stop or hopefully make me go into real labor.
Then at my last prenatal appointment on Monday April 25th at 39 weeks 2 days pregnant, the doctor I saw was very concerned about all the false labor I was having and the long drive to the hospital, even though I wasn’t dilating at all yet. He didn’t like that I was avoiding getting checked out because of the distance to their regular office in Tucson (most of my prenatal appointments were in their local office where they only saw patients on Mondays). He strongly encouraged me to go stay in a hotel near their regular office and the hospital. Right after the appointment I called my mom and asked her if she could come into town earlier than planned since I’d need help with my daughter while staying in the hotel especially if I went into real labor while there. Then I booked a room at a hotel for Friday through Sunday nights, planning to stay longer if necessary. .
However, after almost a week of false labor it finally turned into the real thing on Thursday, April 28th. I spent the morning having pretty regular contractions, like 10-20 minutes apart and getting more intense throughout the morning, but I was in serious denial after all that false labor, I just kept expecting it to peter out again. A few hours after my husband returned home from picking up my mom from the airport we decided to go to dinner and then grocery shopping - by that point my contractions were 7-10 minutes apart and I was having trouble talking through them. Yet, I was still in denial. LOL! In the grocery store parking lot I had to stop for a contraction, some store employees freaked out when they saw me and asked if I wanted a wheelchair. I told them I was fine and I needed to walk. Once home I thought maybe a hot bath would help ease my contractions so I could get some rest. But unlike the baths I took when I was having false labor, my contractions didn’t slow down or get less intense this time. My husband went to bed because he had to get up super early for work, and since I was still in denial that I was in real labor, I tried to go to bed as well. After several minutes in the bed I realized I wasn’t going to be able to fall asleep so I went out to the couch - hoping I could get comfortable there and the contractions would go away. No such luck! They just got closer together – coming ever 4-8 minutes at this point - and by midnight I was moaning through them. I was moaning so loud that my husband woke up and came out to the living room. I told him that I was finally convinced this was the real thing and we should go, so we got everything together and woke my mom to tell her we were leaving.
The drive to Tucson was not fun AT ALL, once in the car my contractions started coming every 2-4 minutes which made the 90 minute car ride miserable for me. I did my best to breathe through each contraction but sitting down and being confined to that car seat was horrible, I felt like a caged animal. I did my best to focus on my breathing, with each contraction I would take a deep breath and let it out slowly while trying hard not to tense up. No small feat since tensing up was exactly what my body did when a contraction started. Once to the hospital I was thrilled to be on my feet.
We got to the hospital around 2:30am and I was 3cm, 90% effaced, at -1 station, bulging bag of water and having contractions every 2-4 minutes so I was admitted. I’m pretty sure the Triage nurse was happy to get rid of me because I wouldn’t stay in the bed which made the monitors slip down my belly. But staying in that bed was NOT an option, I had to be up on my feet. My contractions by that point were so intense I was having an intense burning & cramping pain down the front of my thighs, it was a feeling I don’t remember from my first labor. I asked my husband to press on my lower back with the palm of his hand during contractions, while I was standing and that really helped. Once in my L&D room (around 4am) my new nurse was awesome and let me stand by the bed, rocking & swaying through contractions, except for when they had to put the IV in (which took much longer than it should have and the nurse manager had to come in and do it!). My nurse stayed with me as I labored and if the monitors slipped she fixed them, never insisting I get in the bed.
By 7:30am or so when I was about 4cm, I asked for my epidural and labored on my feet until the anesthesiologist arrived. Once there we discussed what I wanted and my expectations for the epidural - I told him I wanted a low dose so I could still feel my feet and legs so I could move around the bed. He agreed to give me the lowest dose possible and told me I could use the pump and/or have him paged to come dose me if I needed more. He was awesome at listening to what I wanted and not trying to talk me into stronger pain relief. I had to sit on the bed to get my epidural and J sat in front of me in a chair while I hugged a pillow. It took the doctor several minutes to get the epidural placed and it sucked sitting there through contractions plus feeling him placing the epidural was not comfortable either. I felt the pop he kept warning me about, that didn’t hurt but it felt weird, and I was relieved once I felt the meds going in. Throughout the procedure I had to keep my mind off the doctor so I kept thinking about my daughter at home and the game she likes to play with me when she wakes up from naps – she likes to run around her crib when I try to get her out, all while laughing like crazy - thinking of that really helped me get through the contractions and avoid moving while he worked behind me.
After my epidural started working I could feel my feet and move my legs, yet I didn’t feel all the pain from the contractions anymore, it was GREAT. I could change my position on my own and I never experienced any aching in my legs like they did when I had my epidural during my first labor. At that point my husband and I tried to get some rest since we’d been up all night, I sat, slightly reclined, in the bed half watching Prince William’s wedding and half trying to sleep. Throughout the morning I kept trying to visualize my cervix dilating – I know it sounds kind of crazy but I did, I would try to picture it in my head (even though I honestly have no idea what my cervix looks like, ha ha ha!). I just felt that staying positive and focusing on the outcome I wanted would help.
I met the hospitalist OB from my OB practice somewhere in the early AM and she said she’d probably deliver my baby – I’d never met her before since she doesn’t have office hours and only delivers babies, but I could tell immediately that I’d like her. She had a really calming energy about her and she was so excited that I was trying for a VBAC, I felt like I had my own personal cheerleader.
Around 9am my nurse checked me and I was 5cm. The doc came in a few minutes later and she said she felt like things were moving along well and was certain I’d have my VBAC so she asked if I’d like to speed things up by breaking my water, I agreed. There was a little meconium when she broke my water but she wasn't concerned. By 11:30am I was 7cm and +2 station which was great because prior to that the doctor was considering internal monitoring to monitor the strength of my contractions but since I'd made such progress she said there was no reason to do it now. Then she suggested a small amount of Pitocin to make my contractions a little more intense and I agreed. She was sure I'd deliver before 5pm and that really motivated me to stay optimistic.
A little before 2pm I was whining to my husband about needing caffeine because I was getting a headache and I was soooooo tired from being up for well over 24 hours so he called the nurse to see if I could have some. She suggested checking me first since I was feeling lots of pressure in my bottom, and if I was ready to push I could just have a coke after I delivered. I was completely shocked & elated when she checked me and I was at 10cm!!!!! She went out to tell my doctor the news and I could hear her yell “YAY!” When the nurse came back in she had me do a few practice pushes until the doctor came in. Even with the epidural the urge to push was intense and, as I pushed the need just became stronger and stronger.
After quite a few pushes I remember getting so annoyed at my nurse when she’d talk – though she was just being nice and explaining things to me – and I remember very bluntly telling her I needed her to count to me because it was motivating and when she didn’t I would lose track. I also remember snapping at my husband to do a better job of holding my foot and leg, he kept letting go or not holding it firm enough. After pushing for over a half an hour I was losing motivation and getting really tired so I asked the doctor how much longer, so she asked me to reach down and I felt my daughter’s head – I was just in awe! It was amazing! I felt an intense rush of renewed motivation.
After several more pushes the doctor looked at me very seriously and said that she thought I needed an episiotomy even though the entire time I was pushing she had been massaging my perineum and rubbing oil on the baby’s head to help her come out easier. I looked down at her and growled “cut me” right as I had to push again. I never wanted an episiotomy but at that point in time I just knew I needed it. A few pushes later and my daughter was born – 3:04pm, weighing 6lb 9oz and measuring 19.5 inches long! It was just amazing to see her head come out and then shortly after to feel such intense relief as her body came out. Seeing her there, held up between my legs by the doctor was awesome! The doctor laid her on my chest and I just couldn’t stop staring at and touching her. The doctor told me to give one more push and the placenta just seemed to plop right out. I laid there holding my baby while the doctor stitched me up – not only did I have an episiotomy I also ended up with a 3rd degree tear. I held her on my chest for quite a while before they asked if I wanted to find out how much she weighed. Then before I knew it she was back in my arms and I was breastfeeding her.
The doctor congratulated me on my VBAC and told me I did a great job before hugging me on her way out. I honestly believe the positive attitudes of my OB and nurse helped me get my VBAC - the word c-section was never mentioned and I never felt pressured to dilate or anything.
Before delivering I always knew a vaginal delivery and recovery would be easier but honestly I had no idea how much easier. I was up and out of my bed as soon as the epidural wore off, which didn’t take very long since I had such a low dose – it wasn’t long after the doctor was done sewing me up. I almost felt silly when they insisted I sit in a wheelchair as they took me to my postpartum room. A couple of hours later I was up moving around my room when the Pediatrician came in to see my daughter and she said “You just gave birth?!” as though she’d never seen a new mom up so soon. And when my husband returned later that evening with our 17 month old daughter I was able to pick her up and hold her – something I wouldn’t have been able to do so soon if I’d had a c-section.
After my VBAC I spent several days just high on my success, thrilled every time I thought about the delivery. And then one day, not long after my stomach had shrunk down some more, I looked down and saw my c-section scar and for the first time in almost a year and a half I didn’t hate it. Then a couple of weeks ago my daughter saw my scar and rubbed her finger across it – pure toddler curiosity – and my heart melted. There was my beautiful baby girl touching the scar I always hated, she wasn't repulsed, she even giggled, and I realized I love my scar because from it I got her.
I don’t think I can properly express how my VBAC helped me heal from the heartache I experienced after having a c-section.
